|
[09 Jul 2007|08:28pm] |
(this is ![[info]](http://img.greatestjournal.com/userinfo.gif) greendayfanatic on a new journal)
i don't know how i feel anymore. i don't hurt myself often, not as often as i ever used to, but it's still there. the cuts aren't as deep as they used to. and i've found that burning is okay, too, though i've only done it once or twice.
i've gotten into taking pills, too.
i hurt myself from the inside out. i implode, explode, i fall apart into pieces. like a puzzle, only there are parts of me that are missing. i don't know what to do with myself. i feel completely empty, i feel like a hopeless cause.
i want love. i don't have love.
i don't know what's wrong with me.
how a girl ten times worse then me can get a guy, and i'm still alone. how a girl that is a total bitch and treats everyone around her like shit can get a guy, and i'm still alone.
why?
what's wrong with me?
plus i'm so afraid to love. but i'm not as afraid as i was. i'm ready to hurt again, i know i am. because with every bad thing that happens in a relationship, there has to be something just as equally amazing to balance it out; it all balances out.
i'm scattered.
|
|